The True Cost of Family Breakdown - Melissa Kearney

Added: Aug 5, 2024

Kearney explains that this decline has occurred primarily outside the college-educated class over the past 40 years. While children of college-educated parents are still living in married-parent homes at similar rates to 40 years ago, the share for children of parents with high school degrees or some college has dropped from over 80% to 60%. The racial and ethnic disparities are also significant - 88% of Asian-American children live in married-parent households, compared to 77% for white children, 64% for Hispanic children, and only 38% for Black children.

Causes of the Decline

Kearney attributes the decline in two-parent households to several factors. In the 1960s and 70s, cultural and social changes led to evolving expectations around marriage, gender roles, and having children outside of marriage. While marriage rates initially declined across socioeconomic groups, they stabilized for the college-educated in the 1980s-2000s but continued declining for those without college degrees.

Economic factors played a major role, as manufacturing job losses and other economic shocks disproportionately impacted men without college degrees, making them less economically attractive as marriage partners. However, Kearney notes that economics alone does not fully explain the trend, as her research found that even when male employment and earnings increased in some communities due to fracking booms, it did not lead to increased marriage rates as similar economic booms had in previous decades.

She argues that social norms and individual attitudes have shifted, with many people now viewing marriage as optional even when having children. There is often an "agnosticism" about marriage among non-college-educated populations. Kearney contrasts this with the attitudes in Asian-American and college-educated communities, where there are stronger social norms around staying together for the children.

Impacts on Children and Society

The podcast discusses the significant negative impacts on children raised in single-parent homes. Kearney presents data showing these children are five times more likely to live in poverty than those in married-parent homes. They have less household income, fewer resources, live in poorer neighborhoods, attend lower-quality schools, and receive less parental time and attention. This translates to worse outcomes across many measures - they are less likely to graduate high school, more likely to be involved in the criminal justice system, more likely to have early non-marital births themselves, and tend to have lower earnings as adults.

Kearney argues this family structure breakdown is cementing class, racial and ethnic inequalities in the US. It creates a vicious cycle, as boys growing up without fathers are particularly negatively impacted in ways that make them less attractive as future marriage partners, perpetuating the cycle of single-parent households. The podcast host, a former teacher, shares his firsthand experiences seeing these impacts play out with students from single-parent homes struggling behaviorally and academically.

Controversies Around Discussing the Issue

A significant portion of the discussion focuses on why this topic has become controversial and taboo to discuss openly. Kearney identifies several reasons:

1. It can be perceived as "blaming the victim" or single parents who are often doing their best in difficult circumstances.

2. Some view it as anti-feminist, implying women can't raise children as well on their own.

3. In the US, there are sensitivities around discussing racial disparities in family structure due to historical context.

4. There's discomfort around establishing social norms that could be seen as restricting individual freedoms.

Kearney emphasizes that the goal in discussing these trends is not to stigmatize single parents or deny the reality of challenging circumstances that lead to single parenthood. Rather, it's to honestly assess the data on outcomes for children and society, and consider how to improve the situation. She argues that avoiding the topic entirely is counterproductive and prevents addressing a key driver of inequality.

Potential Solutions

Kearney outlines several approaches to address the decline in two-parent households:

1. Re-establish social norms around two-parent households for children through messaging from community leaders, policymakers, and media.

2. Improve economic opportunities for non-college-educated men to make them more viable as partners.

3. Invest in programs aimed at strengthening families and helping parents achieve stable relationships. Currently less than 1% of the US Administration for Children and Families budget goes to such programs.

4. Scale up mentoring and job opportunity programs for at-risk youth, particularly boys, to help break the cycle.

5. Continue supporting single parents and children from single-parent homes to mitigate negative impacts.

Kearney emphasizes there's no single solution, but rather a need to approach the issue from many angles simultaneously. She expresses optimism that the cycle can be broken with concerted effort.

Media Influences and Broader Cultural Factors

The discussion touches on the role of media and cultural messaging in shaping family formation decisions. Kearney shares research she conducted showing that the MTV show "16 and Pregnant" contributed to a significant drop in teen pregnancies by portraying the challenges of teen parenthood. This demonstrates how media portrayals can influence behavior around family formation.

The increasing secularization of society is also discussed as a potential factor, as religious institutions have traditionally reinforced norms around marriage and family structure. With fewer people participating in religious communities, there are fewer trusted voices promoting these messages.

The role of pornography in changing relationship dynamics is briefly mentioned, with Kearney noting that it frequently comes up in discussions about barriers to forming healthy relationships, particularly for young men.

Closing Thoughts

The interview concludes with Kearney identifying low birth rates globally as another critical but under-discussed issue related to family formation. She notes that all high and middle-income countries are now below replacement level fertility, which will create significant economic and societal challenges in the coming decades.

Throughout the discussion, Kearney emphasizes the need to approach this topic with empathy, focusing on data and evidence rather than moralizing. She argues for the importance of having honest conversations about family structure, even when uncomfortable, in order to address its impacts on inequality and child outcomes. The overall message is that while there are no easy solutions, ignoring the issue is not an option if we want to improve outcomes for children and reduce societal inequalities.