Tiny Fixes for a Tired Life: 7 Habits That Make Your Life Better

Recognizing the Overwhelm and the Need for Small Changes

Mel begins by sharing a personal story about missing a close friend’s birthday despite caring deeply, illustrating how fatigue and distraction can interfere with even the most meaningful relationships. She points out that caring more isn’t the problem; rather, it’s the overload that prevents us from showing up as we wish to. This sets the stage for her message: tiny, manageable habits can help restore connection, presence, and a sense of self without adding more pressure to already busy lives.

Habit One: Replay the Good Stuff

The first habit Mel introduces is what she calls “replay the good stuff.” This simple practice involves scrolling through your phone’s photo gallery to revisit cherished memories and images of loved ones. Mel explains that this act, though seemingly trivial, has powerful psychological benefits. Research from UCLA shows that viewing photos of people we care about activates a sense of social support, which reduces stress and lifts our spirits. Behavioral psychologist Dr. Ethan Cross further supports this by explaining how looking at pictures of attachment figures helps people recover faster from distressing experiences. Mel encourages listeners to use their phones intentionally—not for doomscrolling or news overload—but as a tool to reconnect with positive moments, which can be as relaxing as taking a bath and can boost endorphins and happiness.

Habit Two: Turn Your Kitchen into Club Night

The second habit transforms a mundane daily chore into a joyful experience. Mel suggests turning on energetic music while cooking, cleaning, or doing dishes, effectively turning the kitchen into a dance club. This habit not only lifts mood but also brings you into the present moment, breaking the cycle of stress and distraction. She cites a landmark 21-year study published in the *New England Journal of Medicine* that found dancing to be the only physical activity among many that significantly reduces the risk of dementia. Dancing stimulates coordination, memory, and social interaction, all of which promote brain health and emotional well-being. Mel’s personal enthusiasm for Motown and disco music highlights how music and movement can be a form of “dance therapy,” turning routine tasks into moments of joy and connection.

Habit Three: Firstname Basis

Mel’s third habit focuses on the power of names in building social connection. She urges listeners to make a conscious effort to learn and use people’s first names everywhere they go. This simple act sends a message of recognition and value, making both parties feel seen and appreciated. Mel shares practical tips such as repeating the name back with a question and writing down details about new acquaintances in your phone’s notes app to reinforce memory. She explains that hearing one’s own name activates brain areas related to identity and attention, making the interaction more meaningful. This habit not only enhances likability and influence but also fosters a sense of belonging and warmth, even in casual or professional settings.

Habit Four: The Power of Showing Up

Showing up, Mel explains, is a profound act of love and connection, especially when life feels exhausting. Whether it’s visiting a friend after a tough day, bringing coffee to a hospital waiting room, or simply sending a thoughtful text, being present for others strengthens bonds and provides emotional support. Mel shares a personal example of supporting a friend through surgery and highlights research showing that even brief acts of gratitude or presence have a greater positive impact than we often expect. Writing a quick note of thanks or sending a caring message not only uplifts the recipient but also enhances the sender’s own well-being. This habit reminds us that connection is reciprocal and that small gestures of love can be deeply energizing.

Habit Five: Cheer Like It’s Yours

The fifth habit addresses the often-overlooked importance of celebrating others’ successes with genuine enthusiasm. Mel discusses the psychological concept of capitalization, which involves actively and constructively responding to someone’s good news. She points out how easy it is to minimize or ignore others’ wins due to jealousy, insecurity, or discomfort, but emphasizes that celebrating others authentically strengthens relationships and signals trust and pride. Research from UC Santa Barbara shows that how couples respond to each other’s good news predicts relationship satisfaction more than how they handle difficulties. Mel encourages listeners to be the friend or family member who cheers loudly and sincerely, sharing in others’ joy as if it were their own, which in turn invites more positivity and support into their own lives.

Habit Six: Be an 8-Minute Friend

Mel tackles a common misconception that meaningful connection requires large blocks of time. She introduces the concept of the “8-minute friend,” inspired by a New York Times article, which encourages making brief but sincere phone calls to friends. This habit counters the “time surplus fantasy” — the false belief that we’ll have more time in the future to connect. Instead, Mel advocates for intentional, short check-ins that fit into busy schedules, such as calling a friend between appointments or errands. Harvard psychiatrist Dr. Robert Waldinger’s research on happiness supports this approach, showing that consistent social connection is key to well-being. Moreover, brief social interactions stimulate oxytocin release, the “bonding hormone,” which reduces stress and boosts resilience for both parties. This habit makes friendship manageable and rewarding, even in a hectic life.

Habit Seven: The Awe Walk

The final habit invites listeners to step outside and engage in an “awe walk,” a brief three-minute stroll focused on noticing something that inspires wonder or amazement. Mel explains that experiencing awe—whether through nature, art, or architecture—has measurable benefits such as lowering stress, lifting mood, increasing presence, and reducing self-focus. She shares how even small moments of awe can interrupt the autopilot of daily life and reconnect us to something larger than ourselves. Mel references Charlemagne the God, a well-known radio host who incorporates awe walks or “awe lay downs” into his routine by hugging trees or lying on the grass. This practice trains the brain to seek out moments of beauty and wonder, helping to break the cycle of stress and overwhelm. The awe walk is a simple yet powerful way to refresh the mind and spirit.

Conclusion: Embracing Tiny Fixes for a Fuller Life

Mel closes the episode by reminding listeners that these seven tiny fixes are not cure-alls but meaningful shifts that reconnect us with what truly matters. Life’s busyness often disconnects us from ourselves and others, but small, intentional habits can restore presence, connection, and joy. She encourages choosing just one habit to start with, emphasizing that these tiny changes can make life feel more like your own again.