How to Turn Jealousy into Motivation | Mel Robbins

Added: Apr 8, 2024

In this podcast episode, Mel Robbins shares her personal experiences with jealousy and how she has learned to understand and use it as a tool for personal growth. She explains that jealousy is not a negative emotion but rather a signal that there is something we desire that we are not actively pursuing in our own lives.

Key takeaways

📖

Identify and acknowledge your feelings of jealousy to understand what you truly desire and what might be holding you back.

🔑

Cultivate self-awareness by reflecting on your passions and purpose, which can help narrow down the sources of jealousy and focus on your unique path.

🎯

Use jealousy as a motivator to take concrete steps towards your goals, rather than letting it consume you with feelings of inadequacy.

👏

Practice the high-five habit or similar acts of self-encouragement to shift your mindset from self-criticism to self-empowerment.

🌱

Push past insecurities and fears by taking risks and allowing yourself to feel disappointment, recognizing it as part of the growth process.

Understanding Jealousy as a Tool for Growth

Robbins emphasizes that jealousy is a directional signal, indicating what we truly desire but may be blocked by fear, insecurity, or comparison. By unpacking our feelings of jealousy and exploring what it is that we truly want, we can use it as a guide to move towards our goals. She encourages listeners to view jealousy as a positive force that can lead them towards self-awareness and personal growth.

The Power of Self-Awareness

Self-awareness plays a crucial role in managing jealousy effectively. Robbins suggests that when we have a clear understanding of our own dreams and desires, we are less likely to feel jealous of others. By identifying our purpose and passions, we can narrow down the sources of jealousy and focus on our own path to success. Self-awareness allows us to detach from comparing ourselves to others and instead, focus on our unique journey.

Flipping Jealousy into Inspiration

Robbins introduces the concept of flipping jealousy into inspiration by recognizing that jealousy is simply blocked desire. Instead of allowing jealousy to consume us and make us feel inadequate, we can use it as a motivator to take action towards our goals. By high-fiving ourselves and acknowledging our desires, we can shift our mindset from jealousy to empowerment. Jealousy becomes a catalyst for self-improvement and personal development.

The Role of Mindset in Overcoming Jealousy

Robbins highlights the importance of mindset in managing jealousy. By practicing self-love and treating ourselves with respect, we can overcome feelings of insecurity and unworthiness that fuel jealousy. The high-five habit is introduced as a powerful tool to reprogram our default settings and cultivate a positive and encouraging inner dialogue. By shifting our mindset from self-criticism to self-empowerment, we can break free from the grip of jealousy and move towards our aspirations.

Jealousy as a directional signal

Robbins explains that jealousy is often misunderstood as a negative emotion, but it can actually serve as a valuable directional signal. She shares how she felt jealous of Gary Vaynerchuk's social media strategy and used that jealousy as a signal to start filming conversations and grow her online presence. By following her frustrations and inspirations, Robbins was able to make significant leaps in her business and personal growth.

Overcoming insecurity and fear

Robbins highlights how insecurity and fear often block individuals from acting on their desires and lead to feelings of jealousy. She shares her own struggles with insecurity and how it held her back from making necessary hires in her business. She encourages listeners to push past their insecurities and take risks in order to grow and expand their capacity.

Robbins acknowledges the challenges of comparison and insecurity that can arise from social media. She encourages listeners to practice self-love and focus on their own journey rather than comparing themselves to others. She highlights the power of curiosity in exploring what draws one to feel jealous of others and how those desires can guide personal growth and development. By shifting the focus from competition to collaboration and learning from others, individuals can transform feelings of inadequacy into motivation for self-improvement.

Disappointment

Robbins emphasizes the importance of allowing oneself to feel disappointment instead of suppressing it. She encourages listeners to express their disappointment and acknowledge their desires. She explains that disappointment is a natural response when things don't go as planned, and it's okay to want things and feel let down when they don't materialize.

Videos

Full episode

Episode summary