The Truth Of Why Matt Left Yes Theory: Letting Go & Embracing New Beginnings | Know Thyself EP 67
Added: Oct 11, 2023
In this podcast episode, the host sits down with Matt Dajer, co-founder of the YouTube channel and movement Yes Theory. The conversation delves into Matt's personal journey, his decision to step away from Yes Theory, and his exploration of self-discovery and mental health.Matt begins by reflecting on his experience with Yes Theory, which he co-founded at the age of 23. He shares that for most of his 20s, he focused on building the channel, filming videos, and seeking external validation. He prided himself on being a tough guy, an athlete, and a leader, but internally, he was struggling and dying inside. He admits that he rarely asked himself what he truly wanted, as he was too busy trying to prove himself to the world.
Towards the end of 2019, Matt started to feel a gnawing feeling that there might be something else for him. He began questioning how he could continue on this path and started to realize that most of his desires and labels were external. He shares that he started filming hundreds of videos and traveling the world, but he rarely asked himself what he truly wanted.
Matt explains that the lessons he learned during his time with Yes Theory are a big reason why he decided to step away. He emphasizes the importance of letting go, being free, and taking risks in order to discover something greater than oneself. He talks about the pivotal moment in his life when he started listening to his inner voice, which he describes as a quiet voice from his heart. He acknowledges that following this voice may not make sense on paper, but it has led him to make decisions that have taken him in unfamiliar directions.
The conversation then shifts to Matt's exploration of mental health and self-discovery. He shares that he met a therapist who introduced him to the concept of trauma and the importance of healing. He began diving into books and resources on trauma, dissociation, and inner child work. Matt reveals that he has suffered from severe anxiety for most of his life and that workaholism became a way for him to avoid dealing with it.
He describes a transformative experience he had in a cabin in Nevada, where he spent time alone and confronted his anger and resentment towards God. Through this experience, he began to listen to his heart and trust the guidance it provided. Matt emphasizes the importance of surrendering control and allowing oneself to be guided by something greater.
The conversation continues with a discussion about the power of listening to one's intuition and the courage it takes to make difficult decisions. Matt shares that he has learned to trust his inner voice and make choices that align with his true desires. He acknowledges that the journey of self-discovery and healing is ongoing and that he is still in the process of growth.
Matt explains that the idea behind Yes Theory was to bring together successful and heart-led business leaders who could inspire others. He believes that the formation of the group was orchestrated by a greater intelligence, and he feels grateful for the opportunity to be a part of it.
When Matt initially received a text about joining a men's group, he was hesitant and felt that he wasn't in the right place to make new connections. However, he decided to go and was deeply moved by the vulnerability and authenticity of the other members. This experience marked the beginning of something special.
Matt emphasizes the importance of sensitivity and how it has shaped his life. He discovered that he is a highly sensitive person, which helped him understand himself better and connect with others on a deeper level. He believes that sensitivity is a superpower that allows him to see things that others may not notice.
The process of writing his book, titled "Don't Talk to Strangers, Talk to Strangers: Awesome Things Will Happen," was challenging and often overwhelming. Matt describes it as a marathon that tested his commitment and resilience. He struggled with self-doubt and at times wanted to give up. However, he persevered and completed the book, which he believes will have a positive impact on readers.
Matt also discusses the power of community and friendship in his life. He shares his experiences of being supported by the Yes Theory team and other mentors throughout his journey. He believes that surrounding oneself with people who challenge and inspire is essential for personal growth.
He reflects on his time working with Logan Paul and how it influenced him. Despite their different public personas, Matt saw a side of Logan that was caring, curious, and humble. He believes that being exposed to different viewpoints and beliefs is crucial for personal and professional development.
Matt continues by emphasizing the importance of showing up for others, even when it's inconvenient. He believes that true connections are built through supporting and being there for one another. He encourages listeners to embrace the unfamiliar and step out of their comfort zones to foster meaningful relationships.
Matt goes on by expressing his gratitude for the trust and support he received from his family, particularly his mother, who allowed him the freedom to explore his own path rather than pressuring him to conform to societal expectations. He acknowledges the immense pressure faced by individuals from ethnic backgrounds, such as Arabs and Indians, to pursue careers in fields like medicine, law, or engineering, and he feels fortunate to have had the space to discover his own passions and prove his own capabilities.
The conversation then shifts to a pivotal moment in Matt's life when he made the decision to focus on his goals and pursue a career in the business world. He recalls facing ridicule and judgment from his teachers and peers, but he remained steadfast in his belief that he should take advice only from those who have achieved what he aspires to. Additionally, Matt credits silent meditation retreats as a transformative experience that opened him up to new levels of self-awareness and personal growth.
The discussion takes an unexpected turn as Matt reveals his decision to change his last name from Dajer to Dahlia. He explains that his original last name held a lot of baggage and trauma from his family's history, and he wanted to shed that weight and embrace a new identity. The name change was inspired by his love for flowers, particularly dahlias, and the symbolism of flowers as a representation of the awakening of humanity. Matt reflects on the significance of his new name and how it aligns with his personal growth and evolution.
Matt acknowledges the challenges of sharing his name change with his loved ones and the fear of how they would react. However, he expresses gratitude for the support and acceptance he received from his close friends, including the host, Matt. They assure him that he is still the same person they know and love, and his new name represents his journey of self-discovery and transformation.
As the conversation comes to a close, Matt reflects on the new beginning he is embarking on after the release of his book, "Talk to Strangers." He emphasizes the importance of play and embracing his inner child, as well as exploring his curiosity and finding joy in life. He plans to travel, have fun, and eventually use his gifts to make a positive impact on the world.