The Stoic Art of Self-Control (ft Chad Goes Deep) | Daily Stoic Podcast

An Uncanny Beginning

The episode opens by reflecting on the first time the host met Chad, describing it as one of the weirdest experiences of his life. That initial encounter involved Chad and his comedy partner unexpectedly arriving unannounced at a hotel room for a podcast recording, presented without any briefing or context. The host recalled their straight-faced dive into an ad read for a manscaping company without any explanation, which felt like an uncanny valley experience—part real, part satire—reminding strongly of characters like Borat. This early commitment to staying fully in character, despite awkwardness or confusion, became a defining element of their humor and creative expression. They humorously touch on how all their professional meetings were conducted in character, which sometimes frustrated industry professionals but underscored their dedication to the craft.

The Freedom of Shame Removal

Chad elaborates on how playing characters like his comedic persona allows a kind of freedom born from the absence of shame and self-consciousness, a concept deeply intertwined with stoicism. By fully inhabiting a role, one escapes the judgment and self-monitoring that often inhibit authentic expression. The host references beloved characters such as Michael Scott from The Office and Kramer from Seinfeld—figures who navigate life oblivious to social censure yet exude an enviable confidence. He relates to Chad's portrayal of such characters as aspirational, embodying a liberated state where embarrassment or overthinking does not constrain behavior. They consider the paradox where self-consciousness, while often protective, can also be an obstacle to happiness and uninhibited creativity.

The Dynamic with Audiences

A thought-provoking part of the conversation addresses the relationship between performers and their audiences. Chad explains that for his kind of character work, an audience unaware of the joke can be more rewarding than one in on it. Surprisingly, a "bad" or resistant audience can actually be more inspiring, as the performance thrives on unexpected reactions and the tension of convincing people of the bit's reality. Conversely, audiences familiar with the performer's persona might reduce the element of surprise and challenge, sometimes making the act less exciting or engaging. This counterintuitive dynamic resonates with the stoic notion of embracing obstacles as opportunities for growth and resilience.

Reflections on Ego

The episode delves deeply into the interplay between ego, confidence, and humility, topics central to stoic philosophy. Chad discusses how ego can be both a driving force and a destructive influence in the arts. While in many cases, unchecked ego leads one astray, fragile ego can prevent risk-taking and growth. The hosts bring up examples from stand-up comedy where ego manifests as either the shamelessness to perform despite initial failure or the delusion of being better than one is. Drawing from philosophy and personal experience, they recognize that a healthy balance requires maintaining humility while also having the boldness to seek opportunities that might seem out of reach. The metaphor of "ego as the enemy" rings true, but it is nuanced by the understanding that a degree of ego (or confidence) is sometimes necessary to persevere in competitive and uncertain fields.

The Importance of Persistent Work

Chad recounts how early in his career, he embraced the "open mic mentality," emphasizing the necessity of continuous work and grit. Success, he notes, rarely comes instantaneously, and those moments when things appear to "click" are often preceded or followed by long periods of invisibility or struggle. The podcast touches on the danger of mistaking early triumphs for mastery and the importance of viewing growth as a lifelong process. The hosts advocate for the steady accumulation of experience and skill instead of chasing viral moments or superficial validation. This aligns perfectly with stoic teachings that underscore endurance, patience, and focusing on what is within one's control—one's own effort and improvement.

Navigating Public Moments

An amusing and humbling anecdote highlights Chad's experience addressing a San Francisco city council meeting during a contentious debate about opening a store for American Apparel. Barely prepared and pulled into an intense public confrontation with passionate community activists, Chad found himself enduring two hours of criticism and performance art that left him bewildered. This story illuminates the unpredictable and sometimes surreal nature of public life and activism, and how such experiences can test resilience and composure—the very traits stoicism encourages cultivating. The narrative also underscores how public perception and reality often collide in messy ways beyond the individual's control.

Growing Up Normal vs. The Privilege of Exposure

The conversation shifts to reflections on growing up in Sacramento and how coming from a relatively "normal" environment shaped perspectives on success and opportunity. Chad contrasts his upbringing with those who grow up around entertainment or entrepreneurial cultures and recognizes the implicit privilege in knowing the rules of various social systems, such as private schools or Hollywood. Both subjects agree that exposure to different worlds and ideas—whether through college, mentors, or diverse communities—is crucial in expanding one's sense of possibility. This recognition ties into stoic philosophy that encourages self-awareness and understanding one's position in the broader social context.

The Power of Authenticity

They explore the significance of authenticity in stand-up comedy, admiring performers who make their routines seem spontaneous and genuine despite intense preparation. Bill Burr and Dave Chappelle stand out as examples of comics who deliver lightning-quick, seemingly unrehearsed rants that resonate emotionally with their audiences. The pair agrees that the best comedy often looks effortless and comes from a place of vulnerability and direct engagement with the audience. This mirrors stoic ideals of presence and transparent action without overthinking or self-defeating doubt.

Philosophy and Popularization

Chad shares the roots of his interest in stoicism, notably influenced by Dr. Drew's recommendation of stoic texts during his college years. Starting with a blog and eventually writing books, Chad's path was neither straightforward nor fast. He was advised to wait until he matured as a writer before tackling significant projects on stoicism, advice he valued. The hosts discuss the challenges of making dense philosophical concepts accessible to mainstream audiences without dilution, noting the importance of patience and incremental progress. Chad's experience is a testament to the stoic virtue of temperance and steady cultivation of skill over time.

Balancing Success and Self-Control

Reflecting on having a show on Netflix, Chad reveals that while the experience was professionally rewarding, it did not bring the expected overnight success or ease. Instead, it led to feelings of disappointment and a renewed commitment to consistent craft practice and humility. The hosts discuss how perceived "breakthroughs" can sometimes derail the discipline required for long-term growth and that true mastery is rooted in ongoing work rather than external validation.

Social Media, Virality, and True Fandom

The conversation touches on the modern dynamics of social media, noting that virality often does not translate into meaningful careers or lasting connection with fans. They caution against shallow "garbage views" and emphasize the value of building genuine relationships through craft and substance. This perspective aligns with stoic teachings on focusing on internal goods and virtue rather than fleeting external rewards.