Sales Expert: 3 Ways To Get A YES Every Time | Ryan Serhant

In this episode, Ryan Serhant, a top real estate broker and star of Netflix's Only Manhattan, shares his insights on building trust with strangers in high-stakes deals, selling to affluent clients without ingratiation, and managing the pressures of operating at the pinnacle of his industry. The conversation spans negotiation techniques, confidence building, sales strategies, leadership, and managing rejection, while also exploring his unique journey from broke actor to a powerhouse entrepreneur and media personality.

Early Setbacks and Confidence

Ryan opens up about his early struggles when he was lost and financially broke in New York City. He reframes setbacks as "speed bumps," not permanent obstacles, emphasizing endurance and the importance of staying the course. To build confidence, he shares the story of buying a fake Rolex early in his career—not as a sign of deception but as a tool to embody the identity of the person he aspired to be. This symbolic act instilled in him the urgency to act and the belief in his future success, illustrating the connection between identity and confidence. Confidence, he insists, is a form of currency that wealthy clients pay for more than information or access.

Selling to Wealthy Clients

Ryan explains that affluent clients value confidence over anything else because they can purchase information or access themselves. To earn their trust, salespeople must exude genuine belief in their advice and decisions. He advises new agents to connect authentically by using "the two C's": giving a sincere compliment and finding a point of commonality. Equally critical is the ability to say "no" to potential clients or deals, demonstrating integrity and setting boundaries. This approach earns trust because it shows the agent is not desperate for a deal but focused on the right fit.

Dealing with Rejection and the Orchid Test

Rejection is a constant in Ryan's line of work, and he views it as an essential part of success. One of his unique coping mechanisms is the "orchid test," where he sends orchid flowers with a note saying "Thank you so much for the opportunity and I'm sorry for your loss" to every person who rejects him. It's a humorous and gracious way to acknowledge rejection while maintaining dignity and composure. This ritual also reflects his confidence and understanding that rejection often reveals more about the rejector than the rejected.

Time Management and the Thousand-Minute Rule

A key to Ryan's productivity and leadership success is his "thousand-minute rule." He conceptualizes every day as containing a thousand minutes of valuable time, equating this to a thousand dollars. Viewing time as money makes him fiercely protective of how he spends even 15-minute segments, ensuring every meeting or interaction benefits his goals. This perspective helps him avoid burnout, detach from negative emotions, and maintain relentless focus without wasting time on unproductive activities.

Showmanship and Leadership Style

Ryan discusses the theatrical aspect of his career, embracing a persona partly developed for reality TV. He acknowledges that being "tough" or having an edge was a strategic choice to stand out on Million Dollar Listing New York, where only three of four cast members would be kept. As a CEO, he distinguishes between managing and leading: managers do things "right," leaders do the "right" things. He prides himself on leading from the front line with energy and accountability rather than sitting back, likening himself to a warrior with a broadsword charging ahead. This leadership style exemplifies his willingness to face risk and hardship alongside his team.

Building and Stacking Businesses

Ryan's entrepreneurial journey has expanded from real estate broker to founder of multiple interconnected companies under the Siran Technologies holding company. These include a cloud-based brokerage without traditional offices, a production company producing Only Manhattan and lead-generation content, an education platform training sales professionals globally, and an AI workflow tool that automates administrative tasks for agents. While each business can operate independently or be spun off, he sees them as parts of a unified ecosystem designed to modernize real estate sales and create more time and efficiency for agents.

Motivation Beyond Money

Despite closing billions in real estate transactions, Ryan says money is not his primary motivator. He views money as a tool rather than an end goal. His drive comes from transforming lives through sales and inspiring others via his media presence. He focuses on goals, discipline, and improving continually. Even on exhausting 16-hour days filled with travel and back-to-back appointments, he maintains motivation fueled by adrenaline and the fear of losing, which he finds more painful than the hardship of winning.

Gaining Trust and Negotiation Tactics

Ryan offers practical advice on negotiation and earning trust. The best negotiators "translate" rather than just talk, meaning they listen carefully and mirror the other party's language and feelings to build rapport and understanding. He emphasizes starting negotiations actively by "throwing the first punch," engaging the other party with open-ended, big-picture questions to encourage them to reveal their needs and fears. This approach turns the negotiation into the other party's decision, increasing the chances of a favorable outcome.

Hiring A Players

When it comes to hiring, Ryan prioritizes intelligence, energy, empathy, and enthusiasm over traditional experience. He prefers to hire "out of industry" and values raw intelligence and willingness to adapt over a polished resume. He also assesses speed, quality, and emotional engagement (the "three E's") in candidates to determine whether they are a good fit. His high standards reflect his belief that a team's capability and mindset are key to scaling his rapidly growing business.

Handling Haters and Online Presence

Ryan acknowledges the presence of haters and critics, particularly on social media, but explains that negative feedback does not affect his productivity or self-worth. Instead, he feels sympathy for detractors and views their criticism as a sign he is making an impact. He embraces authenticity and humor in his online persona, often joking around and showing vulnerability, which deepens connection with fans and humanizes his brand despite his elite status.

Navigating a Changing Industry

Ryan criticizes traditional real estate franchises for outdated practices and fading influence in a fast-evolving market. He champions cloud brokerage models that leverage technology and organic lead generation rather than relying on buying revenue or old-school sales tactics. His vision is to disrupt the industry by creating the most diverse and dynamic real estate company, profitable and doubling in size yearly, with advanced AI tools that automate administrative work and empower agents to sell more efficiently.

Dealing with False Buyers and Fraud

Ryan highlights challenges he faces with fake buyers and scammers who waste time and effort. Due diligence like online research and verifying fund proofs is necessary but not foolproof. He recounts stories of suspicious buyers with forged credentials or absurd stories, showing how the real estate world is vulnerable to sophisticated cons. This complexity demands vigilance and strong negotiation intelligence to avoid costly mistakes.

Confidence as Identity and Roadmapping

He advises developing confidence through a clear sense of identity and future vision. Ryan recommends defining oneself beyond superficial labels, envisioning a detailed "future memoir" 24 months ahead that captures who you want to be. This roadmap becomes a practical guide to building confidence as you incrementally realize that identity, propelling personal and professional growth with intention and purpose.

Selling Without Sucking Up

Ryan sums up the art of selling to wealthy clients as combining authenticity with boundary-setting. This means genuinely complimenting and connecting without flattery or obsequiousness. Trust comes from being forthright, sometimes even saying no when a deal or price is out of alignment. The key is to make clients feel in control and confident in their decisions while positioning yourself as their expert ally rather than a sycophant.

Future of Only Manhattan and Media Control

Ryan shares insights about the Netflix show Only Manhattan, explaining its unique narrative style and real-time storytelling. Unlike traditional syndicated shows, it allows full creative freedom and builds a continuous arc with character development and behind-the-scenes business drama. The show not only entertains but serves as a live documentation of building a company, creating unprecedented transparency for viewers and elevating the real estate reality genre.

The Power of Follow-Up and Persistence

The hallmark of elite salespeople in Ryan's world is relentless follow-up and persistence. Top performers accept losses as inevitable but continually outpace their failures through consistent, disciplined engagement. They use systems and processes to track conversations, respond promptly, and never leave potential deals or relationships hanging. This tenacity combined with responsiveness is foundational to sustained success at the highest levels.