Mo Gawdat's Happiness Formula: Retrain Your Brain to Be Happy Now

Added: Mar 14, 2024

Unhappy Despite Professional Success

Gawdat begins by sharing his background, growing up in Egypt and pursuing a career in engineering. Despite achieving great success in his professional life, Gawdat found himself deeply unhappy and unfulfilled. It wasn't until the loss of his son, Ali, that Gawdat was forced to confront his own unhappiness and seek a new path towards finding true happiness.

Definition of Happiness

Gawdat's journey towards happiness was not easy, as he struggled to understand what happiness truly meant to him. Through introspection and self-reflection, he realized that happiness is not a destination but a state of being that is already within us.

Gawdat introduces the happiness equation as events minus expectations, where unhappiness occurs when an event falls short of our expectations. He defines happiness as a state of being calm, peaceful, and contented with life as it is. He explains that serotonin, a calming hormone, is released in the body during moments of happiness, signaling safety and relaxation. He contrasts happiness with the temporary rush of dopamine, a reward hormone that can be addictive when seeking pleasure and excitement. He emphasizes that happiness is a choice that we can make, even in the face of adversity and loss.

Unhappiness as a Survival Mechanism

Gawdat highlights that unhappiness is a survival mechanism, signaling when something is not right in our lives. He compares it to a fire alarm, indicating a need for attention and action. He encourages listeners to acknowledge their unhappiness and identify the triggers, which are often thoughts rather than events. By questioning the truth of these thoughts and determining actionable steps to address them, individuals can move from unhappiness to a state of acceptance and commitment.

Overcoming Unhappiness

To overcome unhappiness, Gawdat suggests a three-step approach. First, acknowledge the feeling of unhappiness and question the truth of the thoughts causing it. Next, consider what actions can be taken to address the source of unhappiness and improve the situation. Finally, if there is nothing that can be done to change the circumstances, focus on accepting the situation and finding ways to make life better despite the challenges.

Personal Experience and Practice

Gawdat shares his personal experience of dealing with the loss of his son, Ali, and how he navigated through the pain and grief. He emphasizes the importance of signing a contract with his brain, allowing only useful or joyful thoughts to occupy his mind. By training his brain to focus on gratitude and positive memories of his son, he was able to reduce the time it took to bounce back from unhappiness to happiness. Through consistent practice and mindfulness, Gawdat was able to rewire his brain for greater resilience and emotional well-being.

Spreading Happiness in Honor of his Son

After the loss of his son, Gawdat made a vow to spread happiness to others and honor Ali's memory. He set out to reach 10 million people with his message of happiness through his book and speaking engagements. By focusing on making others happy, he found a sense of purpose and fulfillment that transcended his own personal pain.

Neuroplasticity and Training the Brain

Gawdat discusses the concept of neuroplasticity, the brain's ability to change and adapt based on experiences and behaviors. He compares training the brain to going to the gym, where consistent practice leads to physical changes. By engaging in positive habits and thoughts, individuals can rewire their brains for happiness and resilience. He emphasizes the importance of daily practices that promote gratitude, acceptance, and joy to cultivate a mindset of happiness.

The Role of Meditation in Happiness

Gawdat also discusses the role of meditation in promoting happiness. He explains that meditation helps in training the brain to focus and control wandering thoughts. By practicing meditation regularly, individuals can develop the ability to calm the mind and reduce negative self-talk. He suggests using meditation as a tool to cultivate a positive mindset and improve overall well-being.

Decision-Making and Problem-Solving

In terms of decision-making and problem-solving, Gawdat advises taking a practical approach similar to that of a software engineer. He recommends setting a time limit to analyze a situation and come up with the best possible solution. He emphasizes the importance of taking action and making decisions rather than getting stuck in indecision. He encourages individuals to focus on finding practical solutions that may not be perfect but are effective in addressing the issue at hand.

Parenting

When it comes to parenting and influencing youth, Gawdat stresses the importance of leading by example. He suggests that children are more likely to emulate their parents' behavior rather than follow their instructions. He recommends parents to demonstrate love, kindness, and understanding towards their children. He shares his personal experience of engaging with his children by actively participating in their interests and being present for them during challenging times.

Gawdat acknowledges the struggles faced by today's youth, especially with the prevalence of social media and academic pressures. He advises parents to create a supportive and loving environment for their children to feel comfortable sharing their thoughts and emotions. He emphasizes the importance of building trust and open communication with children, allowing them to seek guidance and support when needed. He highlights the significance of being a source of comfort and understanding for children during difficult times.