The SECRETS Of Irresistible People (This Works Like MAGIC!) w/ John Maxwell

The SECRETS Of Irresistible People (This Works Like MAGIC!) w/ John Maxwell thumbnail

Added: Sep 19, 2023

In this podcast episode, Lewis Howes interviews leadership expert John Maxwell on the topics of success, significance, marriage, and leadership. Maxwell shares his insights on the qualities that make leaders irresistible and the importance of communication in leadership.

Maxwell begins by discussing the difference between success and significance. He believes that success is about oneself, while significance is about others. He notes that successful people who live only for themselves often become unhappy, while those who live a life of significance by adding value to others find deep satisfaction. Maxwell emphasizes the importance of having a dream and living a life focused on helping and serving others.

The conversation then shifts to the topic of marriage and the lessons Maxwell has learned about leadership from his own mistakes in his 54-year marriage. He emphasizes the importance of giving 100% in a marriage and valuing and respecting one's partner. Maxwell also highlights the need for individuality and personal growth within a marriage, rather than trying to make the other person conform to one's own desires.

Moving on to the qualities of irresistible leaders, Maxwell explains that they have a joy for life and a genuine interest in people. He shares a quote from a comedian who said that it's hard to be funny if you don't have fun, and Maxwell believes the same applies to leadership. He emphasizes the importance of being a lifter rather than a leaner, adding value to others and having a positive impact on their lives.

Maxwell then discusses the habits of irresistible leaders. He explains that they have the ability to see more than others see and to cast a vision that is contagious. They are able to develop and create teams, valuing and respecting the people they work with. Maxwell also emphasizes the importance of integrity and valuing people in leadership.

When asked about the qualities that have remained the same in leadership over the past 50 years, Maxwell highlights the importance of good relationships and the ability to cast a vision. He explains that people won't go along with a leader they can't get along with, and that casting a vision is essential for inspiring and motivating others. However, he also notes that leadership has changed in the sense that leaders now need to see before others see and be agile and adaptable in a rapidly changing world.

Maxwell then discusses the biggest mistake leaders make today, which is leading by assumption. He emphasizes the importance of finding and understanding people before leading them, rather than making assumptions about their needs and desires. He believes that assumptions are the mother of all mess-ups in leadership.

Finally, Maxwell talks about his new book, "The 16 Laws of Communication." He explains that communication is a crucial aspect of leadership and shares his greatest strength in leadership, which is the ability to cast a vision that people want to be a part of. He also discusses his greatest communication strength, which is his ability to connect with people and make them feel valued and heard. However, he admits that he still works on his to-don't list and sometimes misses out on opportunities due to time constraints.

Maxwell continues by discussing the importance of being contagious with vision. He believes that success draws people in and inspires them to follow. In terms of leadership, Maxwell emphasizes the need to cast a vision and communicate effectively. He believes that one of his greatest strengths in communication is his ability to connect with people. He advises aspiring communicators to get over themselves and focus on the audience instead.

Maxwell also talks about his new book, "The 16 Laws of Communication," which explores how to connect with people. He shares a story about filming a video on the 16 laws and insisting that it start with him in the audience, not on the stage. This highlights his belief that communication is all about the people and understanding their needs.

The conversation then shifts to Maxwell's recent venture into songwriting. A man in Nashville suggested that Maxwell write songs based on his books, and he decided to give it a try. He collaborated with talented songwriters and released songs like "Get Over Myself" and "Day by Day." Maxwell finds joy in this creative process and plans to release a whole album throughout the year.

Howes then asks Maxwell about his advice for becoming a better communicator. Maxwell shares a personal story about his journey to overcome stage fright and connect with his audience. He emphasizes the importance of getting over oneself and focusing on others. When people are consumed with themselves, they cannot truly connect with others. Maxwell believes that once individuals get over themselves, their nervousness and self-doubt will fade away.

Maxwell also discusses the three truths he would leave behind if he could no longer share his books or content. First, he believes in the importance of having a relationship with God and finding fulfillment through faith. Second, he emphasizes the significance of a significant life, which comes from caring for and helping others. Finally, he encourages continuous personal growth, as he believes that growth is happiness.

Howes asks Maxwell to recommend three books that have had a significant impact on him. Maxwell suggests "Team of Rivals" by Doris Kearns Goodwin, which tells the story of Abraham Lincoln and his ability to unite a divided country. He also recommends "How to Win Friends and Influence People" by Dale Carnegie, a classic book on building relationships. Lastly, Maxwell suggests "Atomic Habits" by James Clear, which explores the power of developing good habits.

The interview concludes with Howes acknowledging Maxwell for his consistent service and commitment to helping others improve their lives. Maxwell's definition of greatness is leaving a lasting impact on people and the world. He believes that greatness cannot be imprisoned and that it will always find a way to make a difference.

Videos

Full episode

Episode summary