Let Go of Negative Thoughts & Reprogram Your Mind for More Positive Thinking
Added: Aug 5, 2024
Mel Robbins begins by emphasizing the critical role that mindset plays in our lives. She explains that the negative self-talk we engage in, which she refers to as "The Jerk" living in our heads, needs to be evicted. Robbins acknowledges that she used to struggle with this herself, constantly saying hurtful things to herself in her mind. She stresses that taking on this negative self-talk completely changed her life, and she believes that if she could do it, anyone can.
Robbins defines mindset as our beliefs and opinions about how the world works. She uses the metaphor of sunglasses to illustrate how our mindset colors our perception of the world around us. Just as different colored lenses affect how we see things, our mindset filters our experiences and influences our thoughts, feelings, and actions.
The Reticular Activating System
Robbins introduces the concept of the Reticular Activating System (RAS), which she describes as a filter in our brain. She likens it to a hairnet over the brain or a bouncer at a nightclub, determining what information is allowed into our conscious mind and what is blocked out. The RAS operates based on what we consider important, which is influenced by our mindset and the energy we put into certain thoughts or beliefs.
Robbins provides examples of how the RAS works, such as suddenly noticing a particular car model everywhere after becoming interested in it, or seeing pregnant women everywhere when trying to conceive. She explains that these things were always there, but our RAS didn't consider them important enough to bring to our attention until they became relevant to us.
The Connection Between Mindset and the RAS
Robbins delves into how our mindset and the RAS work together, often reinforcing each other. If we have a negative mindset, our RAS will filter information in a way that confirms and strengthens that negativity. Conversely, a positive mindset can lead our RAS to highlight positive aspects of our experiences, creating an upward spiral.
She uses the example of self-doubt to illustrate this connection. When we doubt ourselves, we focus on our mistakes and shortcomings, training our RAS to filter out our successes and amplify our perceived failures. This creates a self-fulfilling prophecy where we continue to see evidence that supports our negative self-image.
Changing Your Mindset
Robbins emphasizes that it is possible to change our mindset and reprogram our RAS. She introduces an exercise called "looking for hearts," where participants actively search for heart shapes in their everyday environment. This exercise demonstrates how we can train our RAS to notice specific things, proving that our brain is flexible and capable of change.
She also discusses the importance of being intentional about what we expose ourselves to, such as carefully curating our social media feeds. She shares an example of her daughter realizing how her Instagram explore page was negatively affecting her body image, highlighting how our digital environment can impact our mindset.
Thought Substitution
Robbins introduces the concept of thought substitution as a tool for changing our mindset. This involves catching negative thoughts and replacing them with more positive or constructive ones. For example, instead of thinking "What if it goes wrong?", we can substitute "What if it all works out?". This practice, which researchers call cognitive bias modification, can help shift our mindset and, in turn, influence our RAS to filter information in a more positive way.
The Impact of Mindset on Action
Throughout the podcast, Robbins emphasizes how our mindset influences the actions we take or don't take. A negative mindset can paralyze us, preventing us from pursuing opportunities or making positive changes in our lives. On the other hand, a positive mindset can inspire us to take action, face challenges, and work towards our goals.
She uses examples such as job hunting or dating to illustrate how our mindset can either hold us back or propel us forward. She stresses that while a positive mindset doesn't change external circumstances, it changes our ability to face and deal with them effectively.
The Science Behind Mindset Change
Robbins addresses the fear some people might experience when trying to change their mindset. She acknowledges that we often become accustomed to our default programming, even if it makes us miserable, and the idea of change can be scary. However, she emphasizes that this fear doesn't negate the science behind mindset change and encourages listeners to push through this discomfort.
The Goal of Peace of Mind
Robbins concludes by discussing the ultimate goal of mindset reset: achieving peace of mind. She describes this as a state where we're okay with everything that is and isn't in our lives, and we're not in conflict with our own heart, head, and desires.
She suggests that when we find hearts during our daily exercise, we should consider them gifts from the universe showing us that peace is possible. Robbins encourages listeners to feel a sense of peace in these moments, reminding us that we show up differently in life when we're fueled by optimism and hope rather than fear and doubt.
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