5 Things Only Fake Friends Do & How to Let Go of What No Longer Serves You with Trent Shelton
Added: Feb 29, 2024
In this episode of the Mel Robbins podcast, Robbins is joined by Trent Shelton to discuss the importance of surrounding yourself with the right people in order to create a more positive and fulfilling life. Shelton emphasizes the impact that relationships have on our well-being and highlights the need to evaluate the people we surround ourselves with.Key takeaways
Protect your peace by evaluating the impact of relationships on your well-being; surround yourself with genuine connections that bring energy and fulfillment.
Avoid being friends with people who exhibit toxic traits such as envy, negativity, gossip, or association with your enemies.
Celebrate your wins to break the cycle of self-doubt and cultivate a positive mindset; surround yourself with friends who genuinely celebrate your successes.
Have clear and honest conversations with those around you to set boundaries and protect your peace; prioritize your well-being by addressing negativity in your environment.
Develop rock-solid principles that align with your values and goals and stand firm on your principles even in the face of challenges.
Protecting Your Peace
Shelton emphasizes that the biggest barrier to creating a positive life is often the people we surround ourselves with. He shares his personal experience of how the wrong environment drained him and kept him from finding peace. He encourages listeners to pay attention to how they feel when they are around the right people, as genuine relationships should bring energy and fulfillment.
Shelton introduces the concept of outgrowing people and the importance of recognizing when certain relationships are holding you back. He shares a personal story from high school where friends turned on him as he achieved success, highlighting the need to surround yourself with people who are genuinely happy for your accomplishments.
Types of People to Avoid
Shelton outlines four types of people that you should not be friends with. The first type is someone who wants your life, emphasizing the difference between healthy admiration and toxic envy. He advises listeners to be wary of those who feel entitled to what you have achieved.
The second type is a terrible person, someone who exhibits negative traits and influences. Shelton stresses the importance of surrounding yourself with positive influences and avoiding those who bring negativity into your life.
The third type is a person who gossips. Shelton warns against sharing personal information with individuals who engage in gossip, as they are likely to betray your trust and spread rumors behind your back.
The fourth type is a person who is friends with your enemies. Shelton cautions against those who maintain relationships with individuals who are not supportive of you, as they may have ulterior motives or hidden agendas.
Celebrating Wins
Robbins and Shelton discuss the importance of celebrating wins. Shelton shares his personal struggle with acknowledging his victories and the impact it had on his mindset. He emphasizes the need to appreciate and share wins to avoid feeling trapped in a cycle of self-doubt.
Building a Supportive Circle
Shelton reflects on the significance of having a small, trusted circle of friends who are genuinely happy for your achievements. He acknowledges the fear of being judged for celebrating wins but emphasizes the importance of finding people who uplift and encourage you. Shelton highlights the value of having friends who are proactive in celebrating your successes and being there for you in both good and challenging times.
Dealing with Negativity
Shelton advises individuals who are surrounded by negativity to have clear and honest conversations with those around them. By communicating their needs and expectations, they can set boundaries and protect their peace. He highlights the importance of prioritizing one's own well-being and not being afraid to have difficult conversations to maintain a positive environment.
Handling Envy and Jealousy
Shelton opens up about his own struggles with envy and jealousy, particularly during a low point in his life when he was cut from the NFL. He shares how he projected his unhappiness onto others and realized that true strength comes from loyalty and congruency. By focusing on personal growth and healing from past hurts, individuals can overcome feelings of envy and jealousy towards others.
Facing Regret
Shelton discusses the concept of regret and how it can serve as a powerful motivator for change. He encourages listeners to envision their future selves and consider the impact of their current choices on their future regrets. By taking responsibility for their actions and making positive changes in the present, individuals can avoid living a life filled with regret.
Developing Rock Solid Principles
Shelton emphasizes the importance of developing principles that align with one's values and goals. By identifying what they want in life and setting guiding principles, individuals can make decisions that lead them towards a more fulfilling and peaceful existence. He encourages listeners to prioritize their peace and stand firm on their principles, even when faced with challenges or temptations.
Loyalty to Principles
Shelton shares his personal mantra of being loyal to his principles rather than to people. He explains how this mindset has helped him stay true to himself and make decisions that align with his values. By prioritizing his peace and trusting his internal alignment, he has been able to navigate life's ups and downs with confidence and clarity.
Self-Worth and Belief
Shelton highlights the significance of understanding one's worth and believing in oneself. He encourages individuals to trust in their internal alignment and have faith in their abilities. By recognizing their value and worthiness, people can overcome self-doubt and external validation. Shelton emphasizes the power of belief in shaping one's life and opening doors to new opportunities.
Finding Purpose
Shelton shares his perspective on finding purpose, suggesting that purpose is not something to search for but something that already exists within oneself. He encourages listeners to believe that they are their purpose and to bring value and positivity into every aspect of their lives. By shifting their mindset and focusing on creating a compelling future, individuals can align themselves with their true purpose and make a positive impact in the world.
Exiting Toxic Relationships
Addressing the challenge of leaving toxic relationships, Shelton advises individuals to prioritize their well-being and protect their peace. He acknowledges the fear and uncertainty that may accompany leaving a toxic situation but emphasizes the importance of valuing oneself and seeking a better future. By recognizing the impact of toxic relationships on their mental and emotional health, individuals can find the strength to exit such harmful situations and create a healthier environment for themselves.
Overcoming Challenges
Shelton offers words of encouragement to those facing difficult circumstances and feeling stuck in their current situation. He reassures listeners that their current circumstances are not their final destination and that better things are ahead. By expressing appreciation for the small things and maintaining a positive outlook, individuals can navigate through challenges and move towards a brighter future. Shelton reminds listeners to keep going, have faith, and believe in their ability to overcome obstacles.
Closing Words
In his closing remarks, Trent Shelton urges listeners to pursue their best life and embrace the journey ahead. He emphasizes the importance of perseverance, self-belief, and resilience in the face of adversity. He encourages individuals to stay committed to their growth, trust in their potential, and strive for greatness. He reminds listeners that their best life is within reach and encourages them to make the world respect their greatness.
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