Added: Oct 16, 2023
In this podcast episode, Jada Pinkett Smith opens up about her childhood and the challenges she faced growing up in a broken home with drug-addicted parents. She shares how her parents' addiction and lack of attention made her feel unimportant and unloved, leading to a sense of self-hatred and a cycle of darkness.Jada reveals that she even contemplated taking her own life at one point, feeling overwhelmed by her emotions and not knowing how to cope. She describes a moment when she had a breakdown while driving, experiencing intense fear, anger, and despair. She called her mother and a friend for support, realizing that she needed help.
The conversation then shifts to Jada's early aspirations of becoming an actress and her journey into the entertainment industry. She talks about how acting became an outlet for her emotions and a way to express herself when she couldn't do so at home. Jada also discusses her friendship with the late rapper Tupac Shakur, describing their deep emotional connection and understanding of each other's pain.
As Jada navigates her way through Hollywood, she reveals her initial resistance to conforming to the industry's expectations. She describes herself as rough around the edges and unwilling to compromise her authenticity. However, she eventually learns the importance of vulnerability and allowing others to see different aspects of herself.
The conversation then turns to Jada's relationship with Will Smith, whom she initially didn't find deep or compelling. However, she later realizes his ambition, intelligence, and groundedness, which led to a deep connection between them. Jada reflects on how her decision to focus on movies instead of joining the cast of "The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air" shaped her life and allowed her to have a family with Will.
The podcast also touches on mental health and Jada's struggle with depression. She shares her experience of seeking help from a psychiatrist and starting therapy, but also emphasizes the stigma surrounding mental health at the time. Jada felt the need to keep her struggles hidden and continue moving forward, as she believed that was what she was supposed to do.
Jada talks about her decision to move back to Baltimore and buy a farmhouse after deciding to continue working but not live in Los Angeles anymore. It was during this time that she received a call from Tupac Shakur, who had just received divorce papers from his wife. Jada recalls their first date and the difficult circumstances surrounding their relationship, including Shakur's time in jail and his proposal to her.
The conversation takes a somber turn as Jada reflects on the loss of both Shakur and her close friend, Maxine. She describes the deep emotional pain she experienced and the rawness she still feels when thinking about those moments. She discusses the importance of grieving and the complexities of navigating loss, particularly when it comes to suicide. Jada also shares the lessons she has learned from her experiences with grief and the connections she has formed with others who have experienced similar losses.
The discussion then shifts to Jada's marriage to Will Smith and the challenges they faced. She talks about the different ways they approached conflict resolution and how it impacted their relationship. Jada shares her realization that she was sacrificing her own happiness and identity in an effort to support Smith's dreams and ambitions. She discusses the importance of balance in a relationship and the need to prioritize emotional connection over external success.
Jada opens up about her chronic state of discontent leading up to her 40th birthday. She describes feeling spiritually bankrupt and the dark place she found herself in. She reveals that she contemplated driving off a cliff and wanting to make it look like an accident. Jada credits her son, Jaden, and a transformative experience with ayahuasca for helping her confront her self-hatred and begin the journey of healing.
The conversation then turns to the entanglement conversation that Jada had with singer August Alsina on her show, Red Table Talk. She discusses the public reaction to the conversation and the blame she received. Jada reflects on the complexities of the situation and the deeper issues it brought to the surface. She also talks about the importance of surrendering and letting go of control in order to find healing and growth.
The podcast concludes with a discussion of the holy slap, a moment when Will Smith slapped comedian Chris Rock during a skit. Jada reflects on the reaction to the incident and the complexities of the situation. She emphasizes the importance of understanding the context and the deeper dynamics at play.
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