Why Gen-Z Is Struggling - Freya India | Real Talk With Zuby Ep. 280

Added: Oct 20, 2023

Freya explains that she started writing during the lockdowns in 2020, which was a politically charged time with the rise of social justice movements like Black Lives Matter. She initially commented on the divisiveness and distraction caused by these movements but soon became more interested in how these worldviews were affecting young people's mental health. She noticed a significant increase in anxiety, depression, self-harm, and suicide among young women in the early 2010s and decided to focus on understanding the factors contributing to this mental health crisis.

Zuby asks about Freya's background before 2020, and she explains that she wasn't very political and didn't come from a politically active family. However, she attended university, which she describes as a left-leaning and socially liberal environment. She observed the echo chamber effect on social media platforms like Instagram and Facebook, where everyone seemed to have the same opinions and supported the same causes. Freya decided to distance herself from these platforms and explore alternative views, which led her to writers like Jordan Peterson and Douglas Murray.

The conversation then shifts to the impact of technology, particularly social media, on the younger generation. Freya notes that the current generation, Gen Z, has grown up with the internet and social media, which has fundamentally changed their experiences compared to previous generations. She describes how social media platforms have become more addictive and toxic over time, with algorithms tracking personal insecurities and vulnerabilities to serve more of the same content. This has led to increased anxiety, self-comparison, and mental health issues, particularly among young girls.

Zuby asks about the differences in how these changes are impacting males and females. Freya explains that there is a significant political divide between young men and women, with women shifting further to the left and men moving to the right. She attributes this divide to the different content and narratives that social media platforms feed to each gender. In terms of mental health, she believes that social media platforms exploit girls' competitive psychology, leading to increased anxiety, eating disorders, and self-harm. However, she acknowledges that young men's mental health is also spiraling, although the impact may be less obvious.

The conversation then delves into the role of personality and upbringing in resisting the negative effects of social media. Freya believes that her introverted and reserved personality, combined with a lack of political influence in her upbringing, helped her resist the pressures of mainstream culture. She also mentions that faith plays a role in her exploration of different political opinions, with figures like Jordan Peterson acting as a gateway to Christianity.

Zuby brings up the normalization of certain behaviors, such as young women selling explicit content on platforms like OnlyFans. He expresses his surprise and concern about the increasing acceptance of these behaviors in society. Freya agrees and notes that there is a hesitancy to correct women's behavior, as it is often seen as misogynistic or judgmental. She believes that society needs to address these issues and have open discussions without fear of backlash.

The conversation continues with Zuby and Freya discussing the double standards and inconsistencies in societal expectations for men and women. They highlight how women are often encouraged to have high standards and vocalize their preferences in a partner, while men are criticized for expressing their preferences or concerns. This discrepancy leads to confusion and frustration among young men who are unsure of their role in relationships.

Freya mentions a study that reveals a significant increase in the number of women cheating on men since 1990. She criticizes the narrative that portrays this behavior as empowering, arguing that it does a disservice to young women by not providing proper guidance on healthy relationships. The conversation then shifts to the tendency to blame men for relationship issues, regardless of the circumstances. Zuby points out that this trend is prevalent in both left-wing and right-wing circles, where men are often held accountable for problems in relationships.

They discuss the lack of clear guidance for young men and women in the modern dating landscape. With the rise of hookup culture and online dating apps, individuals are faced with an overwhelming number of options, making it difficult to make meaningful connections. Freya mentions the conflicting messages women receive about being independent and emotionally detached versus being sweet and caring. This confusion leads to a struggle in finding the right balance in relationships.

Zuby emphasizes the importance of recognizing the natural instincts of men and women, such as men's instinct to protect women and children. He argues that these instincts have always been acknowledged throughout history, but the current culture tries to suppress or deny them. This lack of clarity on gender roles and expectations leaves many young men feeling lost and unsure of how to navigate relationships.

The conversation then delves into the impact of social media and online platforms on relationships. Zuby and Freya discuss how social media amplifies the voices of those who have been hurt in relationships, leading to a skewed perception of reality. They highlight the importance of separating societal and cultural conversations from personal experiences, as people often take things personally and fail to see the bigger picture.

They touch on the issue of marriage and the high divorce rate in Western societies. Zuby acknowledges that marriage needs to be fixed, citing the high divorce rate and the burden of alimony and child support falling on men. He argues that these concerns need to be addressed honestly and openly, rather than hiding the facts or dismissing them. Freya shares her experience of writing an article about the glamorization of divorce and the negative response she received from individuals who took it personally.

The conversation continues with a discussion on the impact of family breakdown and divorce on mental health, particularly among the younger generation. They highlight the need to address these issues and provide proper guidance and support to young people.

Zuby continues the conversation by acknowledging the discomfort people have with discussing these topics, as they often involve personal experiences and societal norms. He emphasizes the importance of being aware of the challenges and pitfalls that others have faced in order to make wise decisions. Zuby believes that being informed about the realities of relationships and marriage is better than being kept in the dark.

The discussion then delves into the current state of marriage and the factors contributing to its decline. Zuby expresses his belief that marriage is a religious institution and that secular marriages lack the same depth and commitment. He argues that without religious faith or a desire to have children, there is no good reason to get married. Zuby also acknowledges that some individuals may not be suited for marriage due to their personal inclinations or lack of self-control.

Freya adds to the conversation by highlighting the consumerist mindset that has permeated modern relationships. She describes how people view their partners as accessories to their own self-actualization and dispose of them when they find something better. The focus on personal happiness and self-fulfillment has led to a lack of commitment and a disregard for the impact on children involved in divorce.

The conversation then turns to the question of whether marriage can be saved. Zuby believes that it is possible but acknowledges that certain laws need to be changed, as they are biased against men. He criticizes the ease of obtaining no-fault divorces and the lack of consequences for breaking the marriage contract. Zuby suggests that the institution of marriage may shift towards a more religious and traditional perspective, with secular individuals opting for cohabitation instead.

Freya expresses her pessimism about the future of marriage, citing the hyper-individualistic culture and the influence of dating apps on younger generations. She believes that the focus on self and the fear of sacrificing personal happiness will hinder the success of marriages. Zuby agrees that the emphasis on individualism has led to a lack of collectivist thinking and a disregard for honor and duty.

The conversation continues with Zuby's optimism about the long-term trajectory of humanity. He believes that societies will eventually find a balance between liberalism and conservatism, incorporating the best aspects of each. Zuby emphasizes the importance of honor and duty in maintaining a functioning society and suggests that these values need to be reintroduced.

Freya continues by expressing her concerns about the breakdown of relationships and the lack of commitment in modern society. She believes that people are too quick to leave marriages and break contracts for frivolous reasons, which she considers to be dishonorable and lacking in accountability. Freya argues that there should be a code of conduct and a sense of duty and honor in relationships, and that the absence of religion has contributed to the erosion of these values.

Zuby agrees with Freya's observations and adds that there needs to be something at the top of the hierarchy to guide moral decision-making. He explains that religious beliefs provide a framework for understanding the world and determining right from wrong. Without this framework, people can rationalize and justify almost anything, leading to a decline in moral values.

The conversation then shifts to the impact of secularization on society. Freya believes that young people are being lied to and misled, particularly in relation to gender ideology and feminism. She argues that the empowerment narrative often promotes behaviors that are not conducive to happiness and fulfillment. Freya suggests that young people need more honesty and guidance from older generations, as well as a stronger sense of duty and responsibility.

Zuby and Freya discuss the concept of the "wisdom of revulsion," which refers to the innate sense of right and wrong that people possess. They argue that certain actions, even if they can be rationalized, can still elicit a strong negative reaction because they go against human nature and morality. They emphasize the importance of listening to this inner sense of morality and not dismissing it in favor of rational arguments.

In terms of solutions, Freya suggests that older generations need to lead by example and set a better moral and ethical standard. She believes that intergenerational living and guidance from parents and family members can help young people develop a stronger sense of values and purpose. Zuby agrees and emphasizes the importance of setting a positive example in various aspects of life.