You’re Programmed To Fail: Here’s How To ACTUALLY Succeed

Added: Feb 7, 2024

In the podcast episode, Erica Colberg interviews master business coach Christina Curtis, who works with top executives and Olympic athletes to help them achieve better results through motivation techniques rooted in psychology and neuroscience. Curtis defines greatness as not just about achieving external markers of success like money or titles, but about finding fulfillment and happiness in all areas of life. She emphasizes the importance of focusing on personal growth and happiness rather than external measures of success.

Key takeaways

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Greatness is about finding fulfillment and happiness in all areas of life, not just external markers of success.

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Self-doubt is a natural part of being human, but it can be managed by shifting to a positive mindset.

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Embrace discomfort as a driver of growth and view setbacks as opportunities for learning.

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Use positive error framing to see mistakes as learning experiences rather than failures.

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Focus, efficiency, and self-awareness are key in achieving success and personal growth.

Greatness and Self-Doubt

Curtis explains that self-doubt is a natural part of being human and that even the most successful individuals experience it. She highlights the importance of interrupting negative thought patterns and shifting to a more positive and approach-oriented mindset. By reframing self-doubt as a normal response to risk, individuals can learn to manage it and move forward with confidence.

Operating on Autopilot

Curtis discusses how the brain operates on autopilot, relying on established patterns and habits to conserve energy. She explains that breaking through these patterns can be uncomfortable but essential for personal growth. By recognizing and challenging autopilot behaviors, individuals can make conscious choices that align with their goals and values.

Discomfort and Growth

Curtis emphasizes the role of discomfort in driving change and growth. She encourages individuals to embrace discomfort as a natural part of the learning process and to view setbacks as opportunities for growth rather than failures. By reframing mistakes as learning experiences, individuals can cultivate resilience and continue moving towards their goals.

Positive Error Framing

Curtis introduces the concept of positive error framing, which involves viewing mistakes as opportunities for learning and growth rather than personal failures. By adopting a growth mindset and focusing on continuous improvement, individuals can overcome self-criticism and self-doubt.

Neural Priming and Self-Talk

Curtis explains the concept of neural priming, where the brain is influenced by the thoughts and beliefs individuals hold. She emphasizes the importance of positive self-talk and priming oneself for success by focusing on strengths and possibilities rather than limitations. By choosing empowering language and beliefs, individuals can set themselves up for greater success and fulfillment.

Comparison and Social Networks

Curtis discusses the impact of social comparison and the tendency to compare oneself to others, especially in adolescence. She highlights the importance of building positive social networks and surrounding oneself with people who uplift and energize rather than drain. By being selective about the company we keep, individuals can cultivate a supportive environment that fosters growth and well-being.

Focus and Efficiency

Curtis underscores the importance of focus and efficiency in achieving success. She warns against falling into the trap of shiny object syndrome and emphasizes the need to prioritize tasks that align with the bigger picture. By maintaining focus and avoiding distractions, individuals can propel their businesses forward and achieve their goals.

Importance of Clarity and Self-Awareness

Curtis emphasizes the importance of clarity in defining what we want and why. She encourages individuals to audit their inner circle and identify influences that may impact their goals. By getting clear on personal desires and motivations, individuals can navigate their path more effectively and avoid pursuing goals that are not truly aligned with their values.

Managing Stress and Discomfort 

Curtis discusses the role of stress in our lives, distinguishing between healthy stress (eustress) and distress. She highlights the impact of stress on decision-making and performance, urging listeners to lean into discomfort and stress as opportunities for growth. By recognizing the signs of distress and implementing strategies such as deep breathing and taking breaks, individuals can better manage their stress levels and make more thoughtful choices.

Responding Thoughtfully vs. Reacting

Drawing from a personal experience of being carjacked with her children in the car, Curtis shares the importance of responding thoughtfully in high-pressure situations. By staying calm and focused, she was able to navigate the dangerous situation and protect her family. She emphasizes the power of shifting from reactive panic to thoughtful response, highlighting the role of self-awareness and emotional regulation in challenging circumstances.

Breaking Patterns and Choosing New Behaviors

Curtis suggests identifying patterns that hold us back, such as people-pleasing, and replacing them with healthier behaviors. For example, instead of seeking approval from others, she recommends focusing on speaking up and addressing conflicts with compassion and clarity. By choosing to say what needs to be said and do what needs to be done, individuals can foster stronger relationships and create positive change in their lives.

Embracing Relapse and Continuous Improvement

Curtis acknowledges that breaking old patterns and adopting new behaviors is a process that may involve relapses. She encourages listeners to be kind to themselves and view relapses as opportunities for growth and learning. By practicing self-compassion and engaging in "cleanup conversations" to address slip-ups, individuals can stay committed to their personal development journey and continue striving for greatness.

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